Category Archives: Self

As the Cat Sees It.

I wonder if how we perceive our reality in this universe is the equivalent to how an indoor cat perceives and rationalizes what they see outside the window. I’m not sure if cats are capable of rationalizing, at least, not to the same capacity that humans are. Their consciousness is not as advanced as ours, but unfortunately ours may not be even close to reaching the full potential of what a consciousness can be.

For almost a year now I feel as though I’ve been a sponge designed to soak in all I can relating to astronomy. For most of my life I have applied myself to the arts, so there is a bit of a re-wiring going on in my brain. If you had asked me a few years ago if I could ever be fascinated by astrophysics, planetary sciences, chemistry, and mathematics I probably would have looked at you funny. I think some fundamental component that makes me who I am has shifted/grown dramatically this year. I am a lot less caught up in my own bubble, or can at least see through it more easily.

I suppose you could say I went through a personal cataclysm late last January, and it altered me in ways that make it impossible to go back to the way I was before. I am grateful for that. I decided almost immediately after, to not only start learning about all that I could relating to astronomy, but to also undertake a project that seems to just keep growing. I was fierce about maintaining that this project be a joy to work on and at my own pace, without external pressure to see it through to completion. As a consequence, only three other individuals know about what I began working on almost a year ago. I am overwhelmed and grateful for their enthusiasm and support. I probably will tell others about it as it becomes more developed, but all in good time.

You may be wondering why I am saying anything at all about this mysterious project if I don’t intend to divulge what it is yet. I am no longer producing as much art or taking as many photographs as I used to, and as a result, feel as though I have less to share through my blog. So for those who care to know, my creativity is more potent than ever, but it’s mainly being absorbed into this project.

There Was A Time

Is it spring? Yesterday it was autumn. Is it morning? Why, it was midnight only an hour ago. Is it summer? It is impossible; last night was winter. Have I eaten, slept, drunk, walked, spoken, worked? When? A moment ago I ate my dinner. Yet my stomach is empty. When did I bathe? I do not remember. I do not remember. I never remember. This street seems familiar. When did I last walk down it? What has happened to the morning, to the hours between the morning and this minute? Where have they gone? I never experienced them. – Janet Taylor Caldwell

Words for thought, sentiments to appreciate.

Multiple Exposure Me

I’ve felt like experimenting with multiple exposures for a while now, and have finally gotten around to it. The top photograph actually has three images fused together. Two of the photos are of mine and Phil’s skyline view, but from different evenings/weather conditions. The bottom photograph is of myself and a wild flower bush. Editing multiple exposures is simultaneously challenging yet completely fun. There are just so many directions they can be taken in. I don’t know how I feel about the “finished” outcomes, but getting the hang of editing multiple exposures is a process.

I hav never written about my personal life on this blog, but I think the time is ripe for a little update. Life has been swell of late for a couple key reasons. My career prospects have improved drastically, for one. After a long three interview/over a month process, I have been hired by MAC Cosmetics! The position begins as on call, but after three months I can apply for a contract/permanent position…which I fully intend to do! I still work at Starbucks part time, mainly because I need their amazing health/dental coverage, but now I can at least see my time with them ending in the not-so-distant future.

Another reason life has been looking up is that I’ve felt the motivation to get back in touch with my creative side. Not a day goes by that I don’t either draw or take photographs or practice playing my guitar and ukulele. I have also been reading loads more, thanks to my new kobo. Some days are more productive than others, but I am trying and succeeding in keeping up with it.

Lastly, over the past several months I have discovered that I have a growing fascination/obsession with astronomy. I have pretty much watched every documentary space-related, and have been reading books on the topic as well. I have decided that eventually I plan to go back to school to major or minor in astro physics. This is a long term goal, and I need to be more financially stable and acquire a ton of mathematics to get there first. Math has always been a subject that I’ve exceeded at when I had the proper concentration/tutelage/motivation. So as scary as it seems to me right now, I have faith that once I’m back in it, I will probably appreciate and even enjoy it.

I never thought I’d be the scientific type, but I am elated to know that my interests are capable of growing outside of the arts. In a sense, it has taught me a lot about human behavior. We are all changing and evolving, maybe some more than others, but no one is set in concrete. Not just in interests, but in personalities and beliefs. A person is not who they were a year, a month, a day, an hour ago. Not just psychologically, but physiologically. This realization has opened my eyes to the way I interact and interpret people for the better, I’d like to think.